Oh home birth, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways:

1. You don’t have to wonder when is the right time to leave.
“Contractions are 3 minutes apart.. is it time to go?!”

2. You don’t have to worry about an overly germy environment or super-bugs.
No one wants HA-MRSA *shudders*

3. You can eat and drink freely.
“I need a fried egg sandwich..now!”

4. You can wear your own clothes or no clothes at all.
One of the things that make a mortgage worth it- walking around naked.

5. You can give birth in the water, not just labor in it.
“Ring of fire! I need a water rescue!”

6. You’re not going to get an unnecessary c-section at home.
But you might transfer if one is necessary.

7. You can labor and give birth in ANY position you want to labor/birth in.
All fours, squatting, laying down with one leg up.. your midwife’s got you!

8. No continuous monitoring or IV lines.
Because there’s these things..called hand held dopplers..

9. No shift changes! Your midwife (or midwives) will be by your side continuously. There are no strange attendants coming in and out- your birth team is there for the duration of labor and birth.
“What’s your name again?”

10. Delayed cord clamping is not a struggle.
“Wait! It’s not been 5 minutes yet!”

11. You control the lights, the temperature, and who is present.
Find your goldilocks setting, or be the mama bear in a dark den of solitude. It’s up to you.

12. You can catch your baby, or have your partner catch the baby.
“Come on in, the waters fine!”

13. Your baby is weighed in an adorable weight sling instead of a plastic scale.
Who wouldn’t want to see cute baby toes peaking out of a sling, verses bare genitals on display on a plastic platform?

14. You can keep your placenta without hassle, make art with it, and even eat it right away if you want.
Freeze it, make a print with it, blend it up- it’s all you.

15. No one freaks out if you want to co-sleep or bed share.
A BABY IN YOUR BED?  Oh, the -not -horror! Just follow safe sleep guidelines.

16. You don’t have to worry about the staff taking your baby away to the nursery for exams.
Birth plan: Baby is not to leave the room, unless accompanied by at least one parent….Yeah- totally not necessary here.

17. No chance for accidental formula supplementation.
No bottles, please. I’m learning to breastfeed!

18. You’re free to rub in all of baby’s vernix instead of having it wiped away/washed off.
Birthday frosting is what makes the party, #amiright?!

19. Postpartum checkups are done in your home.
Pants not required.

20. When all is said and done, you get to sleep in your own bed.
Because where else would you want to be when you’ve just birthed a tiny human?

 

Why do you love home birth? Let us know in the comments below!